Jo Davidson

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7 Secrets of Women Who Get What They Want

8/5/2015

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Do you ever wonder how some women just always seem to get what they want? Their life looks like a breeze and their cheery disposition is enough to turn you green. They don’t work long hours, yet they’re more appreciated in the workplace; they’re not the smartest or most talented, but they get selected for the top opportunities; they have plenty of responsibilities and seem to be involved in lots of extra-curricular activities, yet they remain relaxed and happy; and, they’re not the prettiest, or the funniest, but it seems everyone wants to be around them.

So what does the woman who gets what she wants, do differently? Well, first of all…

1. She’s Not Comparing Herself to You (or anyone else)
You see, the woman who gets what she wants, is focused on bettering her best, in order to get what she wants; and she’s not looking to get it at the expense of anyone else. In fact, if she sees you doing well she’ll be delighted for you, because she doesn’t believe that her own success is dependent on being better than you, and she’s right. As long as she’s improving herself daily, she can relax in the knowledge that she’s getting better each day. As a result her stress is lower, because she is happy with her personal progress, rather than jealous of those who are further ahead.

2. She Knows Her Worth
Above all else, this woman knows her worth. She takes her work and her reputation seriously, but she doesn’t do lots of extra hours for the organisation because she knows how very precious her time is. She is well aware that her time is limited, and she’s not going to waste it. Even if she loves her work, she has other priorities to take into account, in order to live a well-balanced life, and she greatly values her happiness, health and wellbeing. She makes time for her family, her friends, and most importantly, herself. She looks after both her physical and emotional health because she knows, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that to be there for others, she first needs to be there for herself.

3. She Knows What She Wants (and she’s not afraid to ask for it)
The woman who gets what she wants always takes the time to understand exactly what it is that she wants, because she knows it’s futile to chase after something, without checking in first to make sure it’s going to contribute to her life in the right ways. Once she knows what she wants, she carefully chooses her actions to make sure she’s always heading in the right direction, and she’s not too proud, or fearful, to get help. If someone has the power to give her what she wants then she’ll simply ask for it. And, quite often, because of her confident approach, well considered pitch, and professional detachment, she’ll generally get it. If it’s something she needs to work for, then she’ll utilise the experiences of others to help broaden her skills and knowledge.

4. She Doesn’t Care What You Think of Her
In order to get what she wants, this women can’t waste her precious headspace worrying about what’s going on with you. If she did, it might stop her from pursuing her goals, and that’s simply not acceptable. Because she is hyper-aware that the only person that has to live her life, is her. So, instead, she’s decided to assume that what you think and say is your business, and frankly none of hers. She knows that she doesn’t trample over anyone else to achieve her goals and so she can confidently choose to mind her own business; to take care of her own priorities, irrespective of whether other people like it or not.

5. She’s a Prioritising Expert
I’ve mentioned priorities a couple of times already, so how does this woman manage all of her responsibilities without getting into a tizz? Well, by only looking after her priorities. She’s just as good as saying, “No”, to the things she doesn’t want, as she is at getting the things she does. And, she doesn’t feel bad about it because, once again, she knows that she has to live with her decisions, and she’s not prepared to feel frustrated and put upon by trying to keep everyone else happy. She doesn’t waste her evenings sitting in front of the telly, or catching up on Facebook and Twitter. When she takes downtime, it’s good quality stuff, be it enjoying the company of friends and family, or quiet time to herself. She doesn’t relax to escape from her life, she relaxes because it’s an important part of increasing her wellbeing, productivity, creativity and higher reasoning.

6. She Embraces Change
This lady is not afraid of stepping outside of her comfort zone. In fact, she does it for fun. She is a firm believer that variety is the spice of life and she’s a lover of new experiences and challenges that help her to grow and develop. When an opportunity lands in her lap, she doesn’t spend forever in over-analysis paralysis because, thanks to her clear intention of where she’s headed, she can easily analyse the value of that opportunity and choose an appropriate response. She’s not averse to risks either, but uses critical reasoning to assess whether the risk is appropriate or not.

7. She Doesn’t See Failure as a Catastrophe
Perhaps most importantly, this women does not allow the fear of failing, messing up, looking foolish, or anything else, to stop her from doing what she really wants to do. Once she has decided that a risk is worth taking, she gives it her all, even though she knows that there’s every chance she’ll not get it right the first time. You see, she recognises that failure happens to everyone, and she knows that it is in making mistakes, that she’ll learn what not to do, and can continue growing into her goals, as the experiences and challenges serve to mould her into a stronger, wiser, more successful woman.

So, are you getting what you want? And, if not, how could you begin to mould these practices into your daily life, in order to start getting things going your way?

Jo xx

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